"How am I doing as a mom and wife? Am I being intentional enough? Am I devoting enough mental space and prioritizing my time to this high calling? (after all succeeding in other things and failing at this is not an option!)"
"Should my vocation be primarily focused on raising my children? And if yes then am I even doing that?"
"Am I honoring my limits enough (after all I am not 20 anymore)? Or am I maybe honoring my limits too much?"
"Is what I do outside of the home good and right? Enough? Too much? Purposeful?"
"I am soon to be a mom of a teenager! I feel like I am STILL trying to figure out this whole parenting thing. Oi!"
"What do I want to be doing in my 50ties (6 years from now, yikes!) as I move towards empty nesting. What should I be doing now to prepare myself for that season? Should I even be doing much of anything right now to prepare myself? Extra time is not really a commodity I have right now."
"I am tempted to not play it so safe, to do something crazy! But what?"
"And ..... should I even be asking all these questions???
Thankfully I have some time today to take these questions out of my swirling head and pen them down. Perhaps they will find a temporary place to park. Stay put for a bit. I stop and pray and think some more and then the thought occurs to me ... "By golly you have been gifted with some amazing women you admire and who are at least a life stage ahead of you. Why not sit down and process some of this with some of them over a good cuppa tea."
So I jot down a list of names. I come up with 15. Fifteen women that I love and admire. Most in their 50ties and 60ties who have raised wonderful (albeit not perfect) children, they love their husbands and are thriving.
I pause for a moment, thankful, truly thankful, for the gift of these women, who are a treasure to me. And I determine it's time to go on my mid life quest with them and ask them this loaded question:
"How did you come to your own vocational clarity when you had school aged children? What did you do in that season to prepare yourself for your 50ties and 60ties? And what did you do to launch your children successfully into adulthood?"
